Do you want to be happier? American author Gretchen Rubin might have the tips you need. She has been researching happiness for over a decade and has shared her findings in several books, including the bestselling “The Happiness Project.” This book explores attitudes related to happiness and suggest twelve rules to follow, such as “Be Serious About Play,” to help improve your level of happiness. In this article, we will summarize “The Happiness Project” and breakdown whether it’s a book worth your time. The Happiness Project summary and review will explore:
- The Happiness Project Summary: 12 Ways to become a Happier Person
- The Happiness Project Book Review
- Who Should Read The Happiness Project
- Other Recommended Sources
- About the Gretchen Rubin
- Happiness Quotes from the book
The Happiness Project Summary: 12 Ways to Make Yourself Happier
When we’re feeling unhappy, we might be tempted to make abrupt changes, such as completely uprooting our lives by moving to a new city, or changing jobs. However, Rubin suggests that our pursuit of happiness should focus on identifying what we love about our lives and doing more of those things. Conversely, she recommends reducing the things in our lives that brings us bad feelings.
In “The Happiness Project,” Gretchen Rubin takes on a year-long journey to increase her happiness after studying research on the topic. She dedicates each month to exploring different ideas related to happiness. While everyone’s life is different, some of the topics she covers might connect with your own experiences. The book explores twelve main areas and is organized into twelve chapters, with each chapter focusing on one area to improve each month.
January: Enhance your vitality
Happiness is often linked to achieving our goals, but reaching those goals requires energy. Energy is also needed for activities that bring joy, like socializing. In short, if you boost your energy, you make it easier to engage in the positive aspects of life that make you happy.
To boost energy, Gretchen Rubin focused on both her physical energy and mental energy. She prioritized sleep and exercise, tidied her space, used to-do lists, and tackled nagging tasks to restore a sense of order. She also discovered that acting energetic, like walking with a spring in her step, even when she felt tired, helped her increase her energy levels.
February: Have a Romantic and Passionate Marriage
Rubin acknowledged that while she deeply loved her husband, there was no romance in their relationship. To make their relationship more romantic, she made space for fun and spontaneity, like planning surprise dates or engaging in shared activities. In addition to incorporating more romance, she took other measures to strengthen their marriage. For instance, she practiced “Quit Nagging,” recognizing that small complaints added unnecessary negativity to their relationship.
Another key shift was embracing “Show Love in Their Language,” Rubin realized that what made her feel loved wasn’t necessarily what made her husband feel loved.
March: Be Happy with Your Work
Having a job that makes you happy is absolutely vital. The social connections we create and being in an environment where we feel valued greatly influence our happiness levels. Fortunately, Rubin found her work as a writer to be purposeful, but she wanted to make it even more fulfilling. She launched a blog to reflect on happiness and connect with like-minded individuals. To keep herself motivated, she ensured that her efforts to enhance her work fulfillment aligned with her natural strengths. Finally, she embraced making mistakes knowing that they are part of the learning process.
April: Improve your parenthood
Children are a big source of happiness in our lives – and if they have fun, we become more happier. To ensure her kids were happier and in turn herself, Gretchen did three things. She tried to be more aware of their feelings and acknowledged them. She worked on being more present including fully engaging during playtime. She also implemented “Be a Treasure House of Happy Memories,” ensuring her children’s childhood was filled with small, joyful traditions—singing silly songs, creating fun routines, and making ordinary moments feel special.
May: Create opportunities for leisure
When we’re focused on increasing productivity, having pure fun can take a back seat. However, Rubin decided to intentionally set out time for fun. She rediscovered play—not just passive entertainment but activities that made her feel fully engaged. She embraced new experiences, even small ones, to break up routine. Finally, she reminded herself to “Be a Little Silly”—letting go of self-consciousness and allowing playfulness into her daily life.
June: Put effort into Friendships
Friendships are important for our happiness. Friends help us through stressful times and share fun moments with us. Understanding how vital friendships are, Rubin decided to work harder on making time for friends. She created “Remember Birthdays” to make sure she acknowledged special days. She also tried to “Be Generous” with compliments, attention, and support, not just with gifts. Another thing she did was “Show Up” by attending social events, even when she felt busy. Lastly, she pushed herself to “Make Three New Friends,” stepping out of her comfort zone and expanding her social circle.
July: Get your Finances in Order
Although money doesn’t guarantee happiness, Rubin and other experts believe it helps you buy things that contribute to happiness. For instance, money can help you access good health care and healthy food. Furthermore, it’s not just about having money; it’s also about knowing how to use it well. Rubin focused on spending money in modest splurges that increased her happiness. She chose to spend on experiences, like traveling or taking classes, instead of just buying material items. She also decided to “Give Something Up,” which meant cutting back on unnecessary expenses, like impulse buys, to feel a greater sense of control in her finances.
August: Contemplate Spirituality
There are many studies that suggest spiritual people are happier, handle stress better, and in turn become healthy. Considering the benefits of spirituality, Rubin was fascinated to explore it. She was particularly fascinated to explore the idea of eternity and death, through the eyes of many religions and philosophies. Mainly due to the concept further encouraging the idea of being present and being happy. She imitated spiritual masters like St. Thérèse of Lisieux, and applied their wisdom to her life. She also embraced “Keep a Gratitude Notebook”, writing down things she was thankful for daily.
September: Find a Passion
Rubin figured out that she didn’t really have a clear “passion,” so she decided to go out and find one. She started exploring different hobbies just for fun, without stressing about being good at them. By thinking back to what she loved as a kid, she found some activities to explore. Plus, she made it a point to make time for projects she was passionate about, instead of just waiting for the perfect moment to dive in.
October: Focus on Mindfulness
Slowing down and truly enjoying the present can make us happier. Rubin aimed to be more present by “savoring the moment.” She focused on appreciating happy experiences and small joys, like a hot cup of coffee or the sound of rain. Additionally, she tried “Stimulate the Mind in New Ways” by exploring new types of music and reading things that were different from what she usually likes.
November: Watch Your Attitude
Mindset plays a big role in happiness. Instead of dwelling on negative experiences, Rubin decided to strengthen her mindset through several measures such as cutting out negativity from her conversations, or stopping gossiping. Instead, she focused on the positives, training herself to notice what she liked rather than what annoyed her. She also set a goal to “Laugh Out Loud” more often, looking for the funny side in everyday situations.
December: Repeat, Repeat, Repeat
Instead of piling on new resolutions, Rubin decided to stick with what she had already learned. She kept track of her progress and reminded herself why each change was important. She really got into celebrating small wins, figuring that those little victories could lead to big changes over time. Most importantly, she understood that happiness isn’t just a final goal—it’s a journey that involves regular reflection, effort, and some adjustments along the way.
The Happiness Project Book Review
The Happiness Project does a great job of providing ideas on how to become happier in different areas of life. It’s clear that a lot of research went into the book, and Rubin shares insights from this research in an easy-to-understand way, primarily through anecdotes as she tests these theories in her own life.
Some critics argue that the book would be more interesting if Rubin had explored happiness in people facing bigger challenges than her own.
However, that doesn’t take away from the fact that this book offers valuable strategies for improving and maintaining happiness, whether the entire book resonates with you or only certain parts of its message feel applicable.
Who Should Read The Happiness Project
The Happiness Project is a great read for anyone looking to have a happy life but feels a bit lost on where to start with improving their daily habits. Whether you already think of yourself as a happy person, or are looking for more ways to inject true happiness in real life, this book contains great ideas you can start applying in real life. If you like practical tips that are backed by research, along with some relatable stories, this book gives you solid ways to enhance positive experiences in different areas of your life, like your relationships, work, finances, and mindset, without needing to shake things up too much. You can purchase the book here.
Other Recommended Sources
As a book summary service that reviews various books on happiness, here’s a selection of other great self-help books on the topic.
- The Happiness Equation by Neil Pasricha explores how shifting our mindset and redefining success can lead to lasting happiness, emphasizing the power of gratitude, purpose, and simplifying life.
- The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor argues that happiness fuels success rather than the other way around, presenting research-backed strategies to train the brain for positivity and improved performance.
- 12 Rules for Life by Jordan Peterson offers practical principles for living a meaningful life, blending psychology, philosophy, and personal anecdotes to encourage responsibility, discipline, and purpose.
For more recommendations on books about happiness, check out our recommendations article, which shares over eight books designed to help you find happiness from within.
About Gretchen Rubin
The Happiness Project: Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun is written by Gretchen Rubin. She’s an American author best known for her books on happiness, habits, and human nature. She began her career in law, clerking for Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, before transitioning to writing. Her work includes bestselling books like Better Than Before and The Four Tendencies. She also hosts the popular Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast and shares insights on happiness and habit formation through her blog and research.
Happiness Quotes from the Book
“Look for happiness under your own roof.”
“Money. It’s a good servant but a bad master.”
“One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make other people happy. One of the best ways to make other people happy is to be happy yourself.”
“What you do every day matters more than what you do once in a while.”
“Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I fail, but every day is a clean slate and a fresh opportunity”
“Money. It’s a good servant but a bad master.”
